Thursday, April 16, 2020

Could our relationship exist without BDSM?

Recently I received the following question:
"I’m wondering if you or your Master wanted to stop the BDSM way of live, do you think your relationship could go on? "
That is a very good question, which is not easy to answer because it is a hypothetically question.
We met via BDSM, we became first Master and slave, then a couple and then got married. So of course BDSM is the reason why we are together and BDSM is the key element of our relationship.

At the moment I can see no scenario where one of us would WANT to give up the BDSM live. In all the years we have been together there have been no signs into that direction. BDSM became even more intense for both of us. But of course if one of us wanted to stop BDSM it would shake the foundation of our relationship and we would have to see where that would lead. You can maybe compare it with a vanilla couple where both parties always wanted to live on the countryside on a farm completely alone and suddenly one part decides that he/she wants to move into the capital and give up farming. This would also challenge and question their relationship. But again, this is in both cases very unlikely because BDSM is part of our inner nature and we miss it deeply, when there are circumstances where we can't live it.

But of course if BOTH would want to give up the BDSM relationship and turn it into a vanilla relationship we probably would do it because also at the moment we are having a relationship. But again I think this is even more unlikely than the scenario before.

Then there could be third scenario where both of us would WANT to live BDSM but one of us would not be capable of living it. For example because of an illness etc. As we want to stay forever together for the rest of our lives of course we have also discussed this certain aspect. Especially before we decided to get married. In this case we would try to keep up as long with the BDSM lifestyle as possible and adapt it. But if BDSM would have to stop because of external factors, like illnesses etc. it would not lead to the end of our relationship. This was the commitment we gave to each other when we got married!

Like every relationship also we adopt, we change and we evolve. So we are both curious how it will be for us in the next decades!

If you have any question or comments about this post let me know in the comment below

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Blogentry #108

1 comment:

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