Wednesday, January 11, 2023

Another visit to Master D. and slave m.

For the first time since summer 2020 I have the honor of visiting Master D. and Slave M. again. As usual this visit was planned several months in advance which always brings with it the nice side effect of more intense communication during the time leading up to the visit. I am not good at keeping in touch virtually but with a fix visit planned for the near future we somehow manage to interact more frequently which helps to slowly increase the excitement and make the visit even more special.

Since we see each other only once every one to two years and I don't have another Master whom I serve I consequently lack training and routine which I hopefully can make up in part by dedication. In order not having to start at zero every time we meet I have started making notes about at least the basic rules that need to be followed when serving Master D. and especially the ones I always tend to forget or neglect like checking if Master D.'s glass is empty and asking if he wants a refill. Especially when doing something else like preparing dinner I often find it challenging to stay alert to the needs of Master D. because it requires multitasking which I am not very good at, especially when performing tasks I am passionate about like cooking. So in preparation for the visit I look for the notes and try to memorize what I wrote down as good as possible. Luckily Master D. seems to kind of enjoy when I struggle with the rules so there is no reason to be overly nervous, which I am nonetheless. On the one hand I am annoyed that I have to make these notes. I would see it as a sign how important it is to me if I would remember these rules, even after not seeing each other for two years. I think for Master D. it is also a very rewarding reminder how well-trained Slave M. is and I hope it also highlights this aspect which in their everyday routine might sometimes go rather unnoticed. On the journey I also like to read in their blog which helps to emotionally re-connect to this for me special lifestyle which is not part of my normal life (apart from indulging in phantasies from time to time).

In my last post I mentioned that I would like to spend more time thinking about under which circumstances I could imagine living the life of a slave 24/7. This was connected to the question if a session slave is only a session slave because he has not yet found the right master. I have to admit I did not spend more time thinking about this subject. The reason is quite simple: I am in a very happy relationship since 10 years. And thinking about finding the right master in a 24/7 context would automatically mean ending my current relationship. And although this thought might be interesting to explore from time to time to me it feels like betraying my partner because I am strongly convinced that there is no perfect relationship in a sense that both partners fit so well together that there is absolutely no need for compromises at all. 

But what I realized during the last days with Master D. is that the part I enjoy the most about being a slave is the mental part. I am a person that most of the time cannot simply turn off my head/thoughts. I like thinking and using my head. But from time to time it is necessary and relaxing to clear one's head and make room for new thoughts and fresh ideas. One way for me to do this is doing sports. During a long run or bike ride most of the energy is needed to move so consequently there is little energy left for the head. Sometimes I am just not able to think about anything. But at times it also happens that completely new paths of thinking open up, for example a solution to a problem I have been thinking about for weeks. And something similar happens during a visit to Master D. As explained in my last post during a session a lot of my head is occupied by the rules and routines (similarly to the energy needed during sports). And this has the effect of completely forgetting about everything that normally occupies my mind: the worries at work, the tasks and to-dos ahead and so on. On the other hand there is suddenly room for completely new thoughts. This can be small things like realizing how my dick reacts with absolute excitement when being in the cage and eating my dinner out of a bowl. Since I wear a chastity device I normally don't really realize when my dick reacts so the fact of being so aware of this pleasure I am experiencing is special and also provokes new thoughts like why does this turn me on so much or what would my colleagues at work think if they could see me right now in this situation (I know, a very strange thought, but this is what happened yesterday and I am actually curious if any of you who read this have similar thoughts, so if yes I would be super happy if you leave a comment and share the strange thoughts that come to your mind in similar situations). It can be completely new dreams I am dreaming. Normally my dreams (if I remember them) all evolve around very similar subjects. But the two dreams I had last night did not even closely resemble the ones I normally dream. I have no idea what they mean but I am convinced that they are a direct result of a totally different state of mind. And finally I enjoy the small mental challenges that come along with a session, such as remembering and following the rules, being alert to the needs of your master or handling stress, exhaustion, strain and pain in its many different forms. In my experience it is important in life to remain as open and flexible as possible in order to be able to handle whatever situation and obstacle life throws at you and a visit to Master D. is a perfect training in this context and I believe one of the main reasons why I immensely enjoy such a visit from time to time. But it might also be the reason why I don't have the desire to lead the life of a slave more often or even 24/7 because then this special state of mind would probably no longer be that special.

By now my visit is almost over and my train back home will leave in a few hours. I would like to thank Master D. and Slave M. for hosting me, both as a friend and a slave, for more or less seamlessly integrating me in their BDSM-lifestyle and sharing their way of living it. This is not self-evident and requires a lot of trust and I always feel extremely honored by the experience of someone seeing in me a person one can trust. And last I am very grateful that there is always room for a joke and laughter. Some might feel that this can be inappropriate in certain situations and I would agree that there is a risk of destroying a particular atmosphere. That this is not the case with Master D. and Slave M. is very valuable and shows how well the chemistry between us is.

I look forward to serving again!

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or visit Master D´s website

 Blogentry #231

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